As a little girl, I scrap booked as a hobby. My first scrapbook was a collection of magazine clippings, models, black women in television, receipts, words of affirmation, photos of myself and family. I scrap booked because images, colors, design, and brown women inspired me. I did not realize that I scrap booked out of a necessity. Without positive and sufficient reflections of myself, my growth into a confident, assured, and healthy adult might have been stunted. My scrapbooks were a likeness for what I wanted in my present and future. I remember the magazines my older sister Delilah owned, solely dedicated to black women; Honey, Essence, Ebony, and Vibe. It wasn’t always easy finding black women to cut out of magazines and I searched harder than my white counterparts to find images of black women that I resonated with. However, there was always an abundance of white women in many magazines dedicated to them. One of the reasons I wanted to be surrounded by the images I did find was because of that disparity.
At the same time, I did not consider the reasons why I had to collect these images in the first place, not to mention the fact that other black girls were also hoarding reflections of themselves out of necessity. While, it’s not uncommon for a young person of any sex or race to display posters of their favorite musician or artist on their bedroom walls. One of the reasons why little black girls like myself had to collage imagery was because of the fragmented representations that we did see. When you're depicted as a caricature and one-dimensional being, its damaging. Especially when you see Becky in many lights.
My love of scrapbooking has evolved, and I mainly draw from social media to utilize digital content to create the modern version of my scrapbooks. Today, in addition to scrap booking, I create Pinterest boards, Instagram collections, and reblog mad photos on my Tumblr. Black girls have to create their own representations because the white dominant culture will present black girls as objects, tools, mules, or not existing at all. Then, as adults, Black women must do the emotional labor to create true portrayals of themselves to counter the inaccurate depictions. It’s no different today as I live in a bubble of blackness.
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As Issa Rae said on the Emmy’s red carpet, “I’m rooting for everybody black”. In my world, Black women are represented as regular ass folks, in all shapes, colors, sizes, and their humanness. In my ideal world, and bubble of all-encompassing black womanhood, intersectionality is an unnecessary.
As Issa Rae said on the Emmy’s red carpet, “I’m rooting for everybody black”. In my world, Black women are represented as regular ass folks, in all shapes, colors, sizes, and their humanness. In my ideal world, and bubble of all-encompassing black womanhood, intersectionality is an unnecessary.
Apart of cutting and pasting images from different magazines, I was creating a world in my collages where Black women are the voice of their own stories. Today, in television, there are shows which represent Black women in their full humanness; Insecure, Queen Sugar, Being Mary Jane, Black Lighting, Blackish, Grownish. Even in my bubble of blackness, I still feel the need to "protect" my identity because of the implications of mainstream whiteness. The white dominant culture is an attack on my black pride. It is something I must protect because its actively erasing my existence. The misrepresentation of Black women continues in academia, specifically in the research academy. Specifically within the academy, the rules of research are code for white wash, dominance, and I’m-a-white-man-who’s-objective-therefor-I-can-speak-for-others. The parameters of research methodologies erase the voices of people of color by conveniently allowing white men to tell the stories and produce knowledge based on Black women’s experiences. The use of objectivity is distorted, skewed, and another avenue that represents Black women through negative “research”. That’s why the use of the digital landscape for Black women is so important. Black women are using digital content, the free range of the internet, and social media to represent the full scope of themselves, strait from the horse’s mouth. My study begins the process of looking at Black women's wellness; the nuance ways that black women represent themselves in digital spaces. In the digital world, Black women are able to use their voice, to tell their story, their way
I'm real.
I matter. I exist. I'm black. I'm beautiful |